Saturday, 10 February 2007

Apple

It's not that Apple produces inferior products. Some of the products are, in fact, quite good. Some are really well designed, even. Quite aesthetically pleasing.

What goads me about Apple is that somehow, this unscrupulous corporate behemoth has duped a whole generation of schmucks into believing that they're cool. That they're "authentic" or "alternative" or "independent" or whatever Apple's marketing department has discovered to be a valuable perception to instill.

How can messenger-capped silhouettes dancing to generic music on a primary coloured background with stupid white earplugs possibly be "cool"? What universe is this?

These immense cunts sell you music that's more expensive than buying a CD and ripping it, that's low quality, that has DRM crippleware preventing you from playing it on anything they don't produce.

Their spokesman is a creepy old wannabe-hip blowhard who wears turtlenecks.

You have to pay a substantial premium to own black versions of the same thing that's only available in hideous room-wart white. No extra features. Just the colour costs extra.

An upgrade means an entirely new computer. An extremely expensive one.

Games? They laugh at the notion.

Apple: pay the market-savvy megacorp to get fucked, you dumb hipster swine. It's a CORPORATION, you "indie"-loving cocksuckers, and you admire how clever they are in convincing you they're cool. You worship marketing. Well done.

2 comments:

andrew said...

1: iTunes music is cheaper than a CD.
2: The DRM is in not because of apple, but because the record companies insist on it.
3: The black products that are more expensive are the iPod nano & the macBook. Both offer increased specs over the non-black versions.
4: Apple make damn good hardware
5: Apple make even better software
6: You're a prick. You deserve Windows Vista

Ladyfingers said...

Hook.
Line.
Sinker.

DRM's there because it locks people into buying more iPods.